For a lot of families out there in this day and age life is a lot different than when we were kids. There are more and more separations, divorces, and single parent families out there than years ago. This has lead to parents being pushed into parenting their children with their former spouses, now of course this means that these former spouses have to set aside their differences, get along, and be on the same page when it comes to the kids.
I have heard stories of people that could not get past their own relationship issues to be able to be successful at co-parenting their kids and to be quite frank that is not acceptable. I feel so fortunate that my ex and I have always and will always put our kids first, sure we have disagreements about each other but the bottom line is that when it comes to the kids we are a co-parenting unit. If she says no to them for something and they come to me thinking they will get a yes out of dad the answer is still going to be no.
A funny story comes to mind about this. I was on vacation with the kids and my daughter was acting up a bit (being a little on the bratty side which I do not tolerate), so I sent her to her room and told her she could come out once she was ready to start being nice again. She would try to come out and I would send her back in, she cried, said she hates me, and then started to say in a sobbing voice “Mommy, mommy”. I opened the door and gave her my phone and said “go ahead call mommy, do you think she would appreciate the way you are acting??” She went back into the room and eventually came back out ready to be nice again.
So once I get back home and their mom comes to pick the kids up I tell her the story. To my surprise my ex tells me that when our daughter gets in trouble with her and goes to her room she does the same thing except she says “Daddy, daddy”. We both cracked up and came to the realization that these kids of ours are testing us constantly and we have to show a united front as parents. I am so happy to have such a great co-parenting relationship with their mother, we may not have been the right people for each other but we sure to make a great team when it comes to our kids.
I really think that for the good of everyone parents that separate really need to make sure that they can work together as parents. It is a shared responsibility and your children are going to need the both of you on their journey to adulthood, so no matter how many issues you may have with your former spouse people need to check their issues and egos at the door when it comes to being an effective co-parenting team!!